So here in this blog, I will share my experience with self-forgiveness. Self-forgiveness is something that I have personally reacted to in my life because my starting-point for speaking and writing self-forgiveness, when I was introduced to self-forgiveness, was speaking it and writing it because of feeling that I 'must' do it. And so for me, I made it an 'obligation'.
In my earlier years growing up, I was never introduced to self-forgiveness. I was introduced to other things such as certain words, and certain behaviors that I 'accepted' as a part of me primarily because I attached some 'positive experience' to that which I 'accepted' as a part of me contingent on my personality. There are some things that I resisted also in my life because I could not 'relate' to that particular process, or particular word, or particular 'expression' or 'behavior'. For example, if I look at 'prayer' in my life, my parents introduced me to prayer at a young age, but I could never 'relate' to prayer because, to me, it was a bit 'ritualistic', and I didn't understand the implications of it. So because I did not fully understand the implications of it, and how prayer can be something that could 'benefit' me, I resisted it.
So when I was introduced to self-forgiveness, I had a 'similar' experience to self-forgiveness as I did with prayer. I did not fully understand the implications of it; so I 'resisted' it. I realize, though, that this 'resistance' existed because I did not get a 'good feeling' when speaking or I writing self-forgiveness. A 'positive experience' did not emerge within myself. Rather, my experience to prayer and self-forgiveness was waiting on an 'answer', or waiting for some change to happen within myself, but I did not REALIZE that within this 'waiting', I am actually 'waiting' for myself. I realize that through self-forgiveness, I have to change. I have to BE that change by MOVING INTO that change that I am 'forgiving' myself for. So basically self-forgiveness should be a process to where I am GIVING myself that very thing that I am forgiving myself for. Through self-forgiveness, it is a point where I should be MOVING INTO and AS that particular change that I am forgiving myself for. So thus, when I want or expect something to happen after doing self-forgiveness, nothing will happen because I am existing in 'expectation' as a form of waiting, but not realizing that within that 'waiting', I am actually waiting on myself to 'move'.... to 'change'.... to 'act'.
So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that the self-forgivenesses that I speak or write supposed to 'do' something instead of realizing that it is me that 'supposed to' 'move' myself into and as CHANGE.
I commit myself to have a PLAN OF ACTION of how to correct myself after doing self-forgiveness. I see, realize, and understand that self-forgiveness is simply like a 'blueprint' as a 'reference' of my PLAN OF ACTION that I will undertake which is a plan of action that I will use to expand myself, and to create solutions to problems that emerge instead of 'reacting' to events / situations / circumstances that emerge.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'resist' something that I do not understand fully instead of realizing that through this resistance, is me 'fearing' to understand it fully, and thus, not realizing that this 'resistance' becomes a 'justification' of the fear of opening up something that I was never 'introduced' to before.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'resist' something that I do not understand fully because of the belief that if I 'open it up', it will 'compromise' my personality or behavior in some form or fashion instead of realizing that my personality, my behavior, and my expression is ALREADY compromised, and that this 'fear' of opening something up, and resisting it instead is a cross-reference of me already being 'compromised' by FEAR.
I commit myself to expand myself by getting OUT of my 'comfort zone' into something that I am not familiar with; open it up, and see how that very thing can support me to expand myself to live my utmost potential.
In my earlier years growing up, I was never introduced to self-forgiveness. I was introduced to other things such as certain words, and certain behaviors that I 'accepted' as a part of me primarily because I attached some 'positive experience' to that which I 'accepted' as a part of me contingent on my personality. There are some things that I resisted also in my life because I could not 'relate' to that particular process, or particular word, or particular 'expression' or 'behavior'. For example, if I look at 'prayer' in my life, my parents introduced me to prayer at a young age, but I could never 'relate' to prayer because, to me, it was a bit 'ritualistic', and I didn't understand the implications of it. So because I did not fully understand the implications of it, and how prayer can be something that could 'benefit' me, I resisted it.
So when I was introduced to self-forgiveness, I had a 'similar' experience to self-forgiveness as I did with prayer. I did not fully understand the implications of it; so I 'resisted' it. I realize, though, that this 'resistance' existed because I did not get a 'good feeling' when speaking or I writing self-forgiveness. A 'positive experience' did not emerge within myself. Rather, my experience to prayer and self-forgiveness was waiting on an 'answer', or waiting for some change to happen within myself, but I did not REALIZE that within this 'waiting', I am actually 'waiting' for myself. I realize that through self-forgiveness, I have to change. I have to BE that change by MOVING INTO that change that I am 'forgiving' myself for. So basically self-forgiveness should be a process to where I am GIVING myself that very thing that I am forgiving myself for. Through self-forgiveness, it is a point where I should be MOVING INTO and AS that particular change that I am forgiving myself for. So thus, when I want or expect something to happen after doing self-forgiveness, nothing will happen because I am existing in 'expectation' as a form of waiting, but not realizing that within that 'waiting', I am actually waiting on myself to 'move'.... to 'change'.... to 'act'.
So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that the self-forgivenesses that I speak or write supposed to 'do' something instead of realizing that it is me that 'supposed to' 'move' myself into and as CHANGE.
I commit myself to have a PLAN OF ACTION of how to correct myself after doing self-forgiveness. I see, realize, and understand that self-forgiveness is simply like a 'blueprint' as a 'reference' of my PLAN OF ACTION that I will undertake which is a plan of action that I will use to expand myself, and to create solutions to problems that emerge instead of 'reacting' to events / situations / circumstances that emerge.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'resist' something that I do not understand fully instead of realizing that through this resistance, is me 'fearing' to understand it fully, and thus, not realizing that this 'resistance' becomes a 'justification' of the fear of opening up something that I was never 'introduced' to before.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'resist' something that I do not understand fully because of the belief that if I 'open it up', it will 'compromise' my personality or behavior in some form or fashion instead of realizing that my personality, my behavior, and my expression is ALREADY compromised, and that this 'fear' of opening something up, and resisting it instead is a cross-reference of me already being 'compromised' by FEAR.
I commit myself to expand myself by getting OUT of my 'comfort zone' into something that I am not familiar with; open it up, and see how that very thing can support me to expand myself to live my utmost potential.
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