Here in this blog, I am continuing with Day 19: Comparison | 21-Day Mind Investigation on Sugar. In the previous blog, I talked about how I compared the Fiber One Chocolate Peanut Butter meal bars with the South Beach Diet Fudgy Chocolate Mint-flavored candy bars. I also redefined the word 'comparison' from me judging a particular food item based on what it has in it, and then seeing that food item as 'better' compared to another food item that does not have that same ingredient -- to redefining it as using the word comparison as a way of examining, and noting the similarities or differences that each particular food item has with the other food item as a way of forming / formulating a 'solution' that can be practically lived as a 'correction' in relation to food that I eat.
I realize that the solution within the previous blog is that I cook something, such as meat for instance, that will stabilize any experiences of hunger within myself so that I won't keep getting hungry throughout the day, and also to cook something that has quality nutrient value, and that which I know that, based on experience, research, and measuring my blood glucose levels -- does not cause bloating, flatulence, stomach pain and / or bowel movement indications, and does not cause any spikes in my blood sugar levels. I also realize that this does not take the place of me trying out another protein bar that has similar sweeteners and properties like the Fiber One Chocolate Peanut Butter meal bars and the South Beach Diet Fudgy Chocolate Mint-flavored candy bars have, but that cooking something like meat, for instance, is used for all of the other reasons mentioned above which are again:
1) So that I won't keep getting hungry throughout the day
2) Does not cause bloating, flatulence, stomach pain and / or bowel movement indications
3) does not cause any spikes in blood my sugar levels
I realize that to self-honestly correct myself is to face the resistance of wanting to buy any more brands that are similar to Fiber One and South Beach Diet so that I will develop an awareness of what I can eat as a protein bar -- that will not cause any symptoms of bloating, flatulence, stomach pain and / or bowel movement indications.
So here in this blog, I am writing self-forgiveness in relation to my relationship to food that has high-carbohydrate content. Self-forgiveness gives me the opportunity, through writing, to look at my relationship to carbohydrates, and to look at the fears in relation to what I have developed about carbohydrates. I realize that my fear of eating too many carbohydrates stems around a video that I watched where I interpreted the information in the video stating that one is at a higher risk of diabetes contingent on the amount of sugar that one consumes. And I realize that the origin of this comes from my biological dad having diabetes, and so within this, developing a belief within myself that my genes are more susceptible to diabetes because of my dad having diabetes. So first, I'd like to write some self-forgivenesses in relation to this, and continue with my fear-relationship to carbohydrates in the next blog.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that since my dad has diabetes -- that I will get diabetes.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having diabetes even if I am more susceptible to diabetes. I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize how this 'fear' stems from me not having an awareness of what I am putting into my body that can contribute in keeping my blood sugar levels stable.
I commit myself to develop an awareness of what it is that I am putting into my body as food -- that can contribute in keeping my blood sugar levels stable by buying a blood glucose monitor, a lancet device, some lancets, and some blood glucose test strips to test to find out what my blood sugar levels are two hours after a meal and / or when I wake up in the morning.
I will continue in the next blog with my relationship to high-carbohydrate content foods and how I developed a resistance to high-carbohydrate content foods because of my fear of being more susceptible to diabetes.