I gave hefty tips to some of the waitresses at a Thai restaurant that I go to sometimes. It appears now, though, that they are under new management with different people. I had one favorite that I "liked" within the previous management, therefore, I gave her hefty tips.
The question is, why did I like her though? I never sat down and investigated that point. I can say the reason that I liked her is because it was a polarity of what I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as. The reason that I liked her is because she is of a race that I defined as 'exotic' -- which is the Thai race. I specialized her anatomical structure, accent and complexion BECAUSE I defined myself as 'normal' as 'not special'.
So within that definition of defining someone that I have 'separated' myself from as 'special', I actually reveal my own self-abuse through symbols, concepts, beliefs, etc.
Not only did I define her as 'special' (through comparison), but I also judged her within/as symbols, concepts, beliefs, etc. (as limitation) within/as her only existent within/as a 'picture' (the three-dimensional physiological makeup).
Through/Within the comparison and judgment, there is a point of jealously of desiring to be 'her' -- to 'become special'. Therefore, I have separated 'specialness' within/as the attributes of a 'three-dimensional picture' (as the integrity of her physical body).
Points That I Saw Within This:
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'normal'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'not special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that 'normal' and 'special' exists.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive myself 'separate' from the Thai race.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a 'black' person 'separate' from a 'Thai' person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support the integrity of 'culture' to exist within/as 'personality'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a male 'separate' from a female.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give tips in order for the waitresses to 'like' me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give tips as the 'declaration' that I am 'separate' from the Thai waitress that I believe is 'special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself with the 'Thai' waitress: examining and noting the similarities or differences between us to make me feel as 'special' as her.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the 'Thai' waitress: forming a critical opinion of her according to her personality in relation to her physical attributes -- so that I can find some 'imperfections' with her to make her appear 'less special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some people are 'perfect' and some people are 'not perfect' according to the shape of their physical body.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become 'jealous' of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her race as 'more than'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become 'jealous' of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her as 'more than'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compete with the 'Thai' waitress within/as comparison, judgment and jealousy.
Self-Corrective Statements:
I am Thai.
I am not Thai.
I am a female.
I am a male.
I am here.
I speak English.
I speak Thai.
I am not 'less than' language.
I am not 'more than' language.
Thai is not an 'exotic' language.
Exotic things do not exist.
I am exotic.
I am not exotic.
I am 'normal'.
I am 'not normal'.
I am 'special'.
I am 'not special'.
I am 'culture'.
I do not have a 'culture'.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'specialness' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'exotica' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'culture' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'personality' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'language' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'beliefs' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'gender' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'looks' to create me. I create me.
Self-Corrective Application:
When and as I see myself go into a pattern of desire, I stop; I breath, and I let go. I realize that it needs my participation for desire to exist. I realize that this is not best for me, and not best for all. I stop my participation.
When and as I see myself go into a pattern of competition, I stop; I breath, and I let go. I realize that it needs my participation for competition to exist within/as comparison, judgment and jealousy. I realize that this is not best for me, and not best for all. I stop my participation.
The question is, why did I like her though? I never sat down and investigated that point. I can say the reason that I liked her is because it was a polarity of what I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as. The reason that I liked her is because she is of a race that I defined as 'exotic' -- which is the Thai race. I specialized her anatomical structure, accent and complexion BECAUSE I defined myself as 'normal' as 'not special'.
So within that definition of defining someone that I have 'separated' myself from as 'special', I actually reveal my own self-abuse through symbols, concepts, beliefs, etc.
Not only did I define her as 'special' (through comparison), but I also judged her within/as symbols, concepts, beliefs, etc. (as limitation) within/as her only existent within/as a 'picture' (the three-dimensional physiological makeup).
Through/Within the comparison and judgment, there is a point of jealously of desiring to be 'her' -- to 'become special'. Therefore, I have separated 'specialness' within/as the attributes of a 'three-dimensional picture' (as the integrity of her physical body).
Points That I Saw Within This:
- Defining myself as 'normal'
- Defining myself as 'not special'
- Belief that 'normal' and 'special' exists
- Perceiving myself 'separate' from the Thai race
- Defining myself as a 'black' person 'separate' from a 'Thai' person
- Supporting the integrity of 'culture' to exist within/as 'personality'
- Defining myself as a male 'separate' from a female
- Giving tips in order for the waitresses to 'like' me
- Giving tips as the 'declaration' that I am 'separate' from the Thai waitress that I believe is 'special'
- Comparing the me with the 'Thai' waitress: examining and noting the similarities or differences between us to make me feel as 'special' as he
- Judging the 'Thai' waitress: forming a critical opinion of the 'Thai' waitress according to her personality in relation to her physical attributes -- so that I can find some 'imperfections'with her to make her appear 'less special'
- Belief that some people are 'perfect' and some people are 'not perfect' according to the shape of their physical body
- Being jealous of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her race as 'more than'
- Being jealous of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her as 'more than'
- Competition with the 'Thai' waitress within/as comparison, judgment and jealousy
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'normal'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'not special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that 'normal' and 'special' exists.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive myself 'separate' from the Thai race.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a 'black' person 'separate' from a 'Thai' person.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to support the integrity of 'culture' to exist within/as 'personality'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a male 'separate' from a female.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give tips in order for the waitresses to 'like' me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give tips as the 'declaration' that I am 'separate' from the Thai waitress that I believe is 'special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself with the 'Thai' waitress: examining and noting the similarities or differences between us to make me feel as 'special' as her.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the 'Thai' waitress: forming a critical opinion of her according to her personality in relation to her physical attributes -- so that I can find some 'imperfections' with her to make her appear 'less special'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that some people are 'perfect' and some people are 'not perfect' according to the shape of their physical body.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become 'jealous' of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her race as 'more than'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be/become 'jealous' of the 'Thai' waitress because I defined her as 'more than'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compete with the 'Thai' waitress within/as comparison, judgment and jealousy.
Self-Corrective Statements:
I am Thai.
I am not Thai.
I am a female.
I am a male.
I am here.
I speak English.
I speak Thai.
I am not 'less than' language.
I am not 'more than' language.
Thai is not an 'exotic' language.
Exotic things do not exist.
I am exotic.
I am not exotic.
I am 'normal'.
I am 'not normal'.
I am 'special'.
I am 'not special'.
I am 'culture'.
I do not have a 'culture'.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'specialness' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'exotica' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'culture' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'personality' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'language' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'beliefs' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'gender' to create me. I create me.
I do not need to 'depend' on 'looks' to create me. I create me.
Self-Corrective Application:
When and as I see myself go into a pattern of desire, I stop; I breath, and I let go. I realize that it needs my participation for desire to exist. I realize that this is not best for me, and not best for all. I stop my participation.
When and as I see myself go into a pattern of competition, I stop; I breath, and I let go. I realize that it needs my participation for competition to exist within/as comparison, judgment and jealousy. I realize that this is not best for me, and not best for all. I stop my participation.
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