27 June 2012

Day 63 | Relationship Dynamics Part 7: Redefining the Word Relationship

Note: Read Earth’s Journey to Life blogs about Redefining Words for a better understanding….

Allocation Point of Self within the Word ‘Relationship’

The word ‘relationship’ has been allocated within me according to how I have defined myself within the word ‘relationship’. I was more of the 'receiver' of relationships. I was never the one who instigate relationships which is the reason that when it comes to seeking 'love' relationships, I why shy-away, and this shyness was simply me seeing myself as inferior to females. I remember the first girlfriend that I had in the first grade. I tried to please her in class one day because I saw myself inferior to her, so I tried to entertain her because we were in groups, and she was sitting across from me face-to-face / desk-to-desk. So I attempted to put my right arm in my left shirt sleeve, and my left arm in my right shirt sleeve in order to please her by letting her know within movements that I could do such a thing. I was shy around her because I was attracted to her physical appearance.

When it comes to friendship-relationships, I was also the receiver of them from the perspective of being a listener instead of being the instigator. I didn't allow myself to be self-honest with them. My first friendship-relationship was great. We were young, so we used to play a lot. But all other friendship-relationships, I really never had an 'emotional' bond to them -- I was there as a listener, but could never form a relationship-tie with them, so I'd always fear being truthful to them about how I saw things.

When it comes to family-relationships, I was also the receiver trying to be / become an instigator because I realized within me that there were certain things about relationships that were just bullshit really -- and this goes for romantic relationships, friendship-relationships, and family relationships. I guess that's what got me interested in Desteni -- because all of the bullshit within this world is uncovered. It's just the point of me releasing all of the bullshit within me as the mind and the world system which I never realized could be so difficult from the mind's perspective because the mind doesn't want to let go of its identity / ego that has been developed since birth.

Dictionary Definition

1. A relation between people; ('relationship' is often used where 'relation' would serve, as in 'the relationship between inflation and unemployment', but the preferred usage of 'relationship' is for human relations or states of relatedness)
"the relationship between mothers and their children"

2. A state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection)
"he didn't want his wife to know of the relationship" 

3. A state involving mutual dealings between people, parties or countries

4. (anthropology) relatedness or connection by blood or marriage or adoption

Sounding of the Word


Within the word 'relationship' I defined relationship as the living experience of me. Although, I wanted relationships, I am the type of person that wanted to be 'alone' in my world and reality, and the reason that I wanted to be alone is because I defined myself as 'relationship'. Most of my relationship in my earlier ages were in my mind. I'd create imaginary friends daily. I first became acquainted with imaginary friends in elementary school. I was about 7 give-or-take. I was fascinated with the 'imaginary store' that I created of which I bought an imaginary skateboard, and road on 'real' blacktop. From there, many ideas of imaginary friends emerged, and I was, at one point, creating them daily. This point of imaginary friends were me existing within the desire for 'more' -- more out of life -- which is the reason that most of my imaginary friends were aliens.

I primarily grew up as a loner. I would sit back and create / record audio tapes of music that I would play on my keyboard. As a baby, I grew up around keyboards, and saw them as objects that I could experiment with -- from the perspective of creating music. Although, music never remained a key factor in my life, but 'creation' did -- which I was talented at -- creating new things. That's why I liked creating imaginary friends -- putting their personalities together, and forming a 'being' / entity in my mind. So I made this point of relationships a positive polarity. I also made the desire for females a positive polarity because of 'desire'. I believed that making it a goal in my life to search for females that looked similar to the girl that I had a relationship with in the 1st grade was 'positive' -- because I'd be looking for the "more of" me to acquire that positive energy-experience that I defined myself into / as / believed who I was within that experience.

The negative polarity would be with people that I didn't have a desire for. Isn't this exactly what we do in the world -- surround ourselves with people that can benefit who we are, and if they can't, then they are of no value to us? Just have a look at the world. Would you see a poor person hanging around a rich person (or vice-versa)? Would a rich person's house be in the same neighborhood as a poor person's house? These are just a few examples of how we create / develop our relationships in this world -- which is the reason why many of us get into relationship with people that are compatible to our personality -- order for our personality to express more effectively within and as relationship -- and what is relationship really but manipulation to keep one rooted / seated into and as certain / specific movements, words, communications, voice-tonalities to make an impact to / towards others with others that have similar personalities -- creating a domino-effect from cycles of energy-experiences used to stabilize the system as a whole in some form or fashion?

Final Definitions:
Relationship: (Re) as the RE-cycle of (LEGIONS) that are the vast multitude of behavioral, temperamental, habitual, and emotional characteristics of a person as their personalities that changes in every moment of conscious-thinking participation which are embodied within the (SHIP)  as the mind that anchors itself (N) to (RELATIO) -- which describes the likelihood of a relationship with another (SHIP) mind who anchors themselves (N) to the possibility of connecting likelihood to likelihood (RELATIO+RELATIO) to create the ultimate positive energy experience which is the experience that the two were actually wanting from each other in the beginning (as the ulterior motive) -- equaling the fulfillment of externalized desires where the person as the word RELATIONSHIP inverted themselves into SHIP+N+RELATIO of which another with similar LEGIONS (personalities) also invert themselves to connect together within / to have a friendSHIP or relationSHIP creating the externalized relationship-tie separating self from one's own internal relationships / patterns of which one is able to direct internally by giving self what self has separated themselves from initially within their minds (SHIPS) -- if one sees that the externalization of relationships is simply self not taking self-responsibility to give to self what self desires within and as external-relationships.

Relationship: (Re) as the RE-cycling of personalities (LEGIONS) within/as the mind (SHIP) -- through and as the participation with / in energy -- as emotional and feeling reactions.

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